Definition of exhausted;
Just so we’re on the same page (in a mental sense… obviously we’re on the same webpage if you’re reading this), I’m talking about the kind of exhaustion where, when you wake up, you feel the same as when you went to bed. It feels like each motion is a herculean task. It’s one of those days when taking a single step is a 4/10 effort, and speaking to the first person you see that day is the mental equivalent of formulating an essay for a critical writing class.
The Bad:
When sleep deprived, we find it more difficult to focus, strength is impaired, and so on. Going into the details of burnout or exhaustion is not a difficult task.
I don’t need to make this section long.
We know this feeling of lethargy. It would be easy to carry on (as so many of us do) about how being tired has or is:
- Going to ruin my day
- Has ruined my day
- Made me yell at my kids/spouse/boss/barista-who-makes-me-coffee
- Made me overeat
- Made me sad
- Etc…
BUT the important part is NOT DOING THIS. That’s the difference between an ordinary person, and someone who takes on the mantle of a Contrarian Optimist.
Not only that, but how you choose to be affected is the difference between a good moment and a bad moment. The power lies in your hands
It would be easy to carry on about how being tired is “going to ruin my day” ,”has ruined my day”, “made me yell at my kid/spouse/coworkers/boss/random-barista-who-makes-coffee-for-me”… BUT the tricky part is NOT DOING THIS
– TCO
The Expectation Effect:
This person above could be you if you apply this mindset
Like I said, you could very easily complain about how tired you are. I’d go so far as to say you were justified in your feelings. The thing is, do you want to continue to talk about it? In speaking about these things, we put our attention on them and amplify the magnitude of the emotion.
In speaking about these (potentially negative outcomes), we put our attention on them and amplify the magnitude of the emotion we subjectively experience
When we say “this is going to (insert negative verb here; ex: ‘ruin’) my day”, we are essentially making a prediction for how our day is going to play out.
To many, the thoughts we think can be written off as trivial since we don’t have an impact on the future other than our choices we make, but what if I told you we do? What if our expectations for the day end up having a larger impact than the physiological processes taking place in our body?
What if our expectations for the day end up having a larger impact than the physiological processes taking place in our body?
Similar to the idea of the Placebo Effect, The Expectation Effect by David Robson outlines several studies where the expected outcomes of the participants were the defining component of the results.
One such study wanted to test the effect on “Gluten Intolerant” People
Why “gluten-intolerant” and why do I keep putting quotes around “‘gluten-intolerant'”?
The self-reported amount of gluten intolerant people has gone form 3% to 30% of the population in the last ten years!
Naturally, this led to researchers wanting to see what the hell was happening. Here’s what went down
Researchers had people with this “allergy” (self-identified) come into their laboratory and eat a meal. The researchers told the people that they were eating a meal with gluten in it (even though it didn’t of course.)
After consuming that meal, the participants began to “react” and started to have diarrhea and break out in hives. Why? Was the food spiked? No, the body was reacting as it would’ve IF they were gluten intolerant and ate gluten.
They were experiencing physiological symptoms, but they were brought upon by the mind
This is the effect of our expectations
“What we feel and think will determine what we experience, which will in turn influence what we feel and what we think, in a never-ending cycle.”
– David Robson, The Expectation Effect
HOW DOES THIS APPLY TO YOU?
I’ll cut to the chase. You may have woken up “tired” or you may have gotten very little sleep, BUT (always a but on these type of blogs), that doesn’t mean you have to self-identify as someone who is exhausted. This expectation you set for your day has a lot to do with how your day will play out. With that knowledge, do you intend to set an expectation of a day where you will take out your emotions on the people around you? Do you wish to see yourself act out in a way that you will not be proud of at the end of the day?
With that knowledge, do you intend to set an expectation of a day where you will take out your emotions on the people around you? Do you wish to see yourself act out in a way that you will not be proud of at the end of the day?
-TCO
Physiologically, we may be tired. We may be moving at the pace of a three-toed sloth, but we are still the authors of our story. With that being said, do you choose to have a miserable day that is “ruined by how tired I feel” OR do you choose to make the best of what comes to you by acknowledging the physiological side of being tired and recognizing your own ability to choose to be better in this present moment?
Do you choose to have a miserable day that is “ruined by how tired I feel”
– TCO
OR
Do you choose to make the best of what comes to you by acknowledging the physiological side of being tired
and
recognizing your own ability to choose to be better in this present moment.
“If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.”
– Marcus Aurelius